Lead Developer For iiSU Steps Down Due To Past Transphobic Comments

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This has been a turbulent week for one of the most ambitious emulation projects I have seen in recent years. Days ago, iiSU showed off a full presentation for their upcoming graphical frontend for Android emulation, which looks and sounds incredible in a multitude of ways. In our coverage, we went over just how intriguing it was, with a PSP XMB theme, social features, and integrations for RetroAchievements, and so much more. However, there has also been some controversy, and now the lead developer, iShade (aka UsagiShade), of the project has completely moved away from it.

While the project was off to a great start, there were some issues that popped up not long after. It turns out the iiSU Discord server used to be a private friend-group server for iShade, and he never purged the messages that were sent in the past. Some of these messages contained distasteful comments, while others contained hateful messages that clearly insult the trans community. After investigation by users in the server, these messages were found, which led the lead developer to send out an apology announcement.

It looks like things got out of hand recently, so I’ll have to step in and address a few things. For those unaware, this server wasn’t made specifically for iiSU when it was first created. A few years back, this used to be a server for close friends who basically played games like Valorant everyday, so you can imagine the environment and the humor was not at all the same as it is here in the emulation space. It was very stupid of me to even recycle an old server and repurpose it to something that’s meant to be safe and welcoming for the general userbase, and clearly I didn’t put much thought into that when I essentially cut ties with those people and reset this server the way I did.

I’ve seen some of what was said, albeit only a few of those screenshots really had anything to do with me. I should clear some things up for people:

I’m a regular person, not a godsend, not a saint. I’ve said and done things before that I know for sure wouldn’t fly today. There’s really no going back, it’s either I look forward or I hold on to that version of myself that no longer exists. I tend to avoid being too involved with online communities because of situations like this being very common on social platforms. Becoming popular overnight wasn’t something I ever expected, so having a clean record would’ve been impossible. Sad to say, I’m not perfect and never have been.

I’m aware that with good portion of my server being a part of the LGBTQ community, being seen as transphobic can be really damming in a case like this. i know how important it can be to not be ridiculed for being who you are. A few of my team members are either trans or represent the LGBTQ community in some way, and I love and respect each and every one of them. I’ve never really voiced an opinion about topics like this, and I always make an effort to not make things political in any way. I’ve never engaged with platforms like Twitter, Reddit or Bluesky for reasons like these. To this day, I don’t intend to. I don’t live in the US, so a lot of the stigma around politics and gender identity aren’t as hyper focused here as they are in the states. I should seriously adapt if I’m going to be looked up to by a lot of people in this community.

Life is very different right now compared to how things were back then. I was around the wrong crowd, which is why I made an effort to leave them the way I did. They were very toxic, insensitive and I never knew how to speak up against any of it, I was never very confrontational with them. I took about a year off to myself to reset. Honestly it’s unfortunate that something like this even had to pop up when so many people are excited for this project, it really does suck, but there’s not much I can do except acknowledge it and move forward. I’m truly sorry to those of you who do feel hurt by any negative perception of me or anything I might’ve stated in the past.

Those of you who already donated, if you feel distaste for me, this project, or anything I’ve said and done before, you can request a refund at any point and I’ll gladly send it your way. Just make sure to include your ko-fi name or a screenshot if you have it.

I’m really sorry things had to happen this way, it’s not a reflection of iiSU or my team. It’s really all on me, and I don’t mind taking full responsibility for it all. Just go easy on them, please. Take care everyone.

iShade - Apology Announcement on iiSU Discord Server

Still, the damage had already been done. The messages were out there, criticism was still flowing, and ultimately, this led iShade to announce that he is stepping down entirely from the project, leaving Nathan (Elder Monkey) in charge. In his announcement, he notes how all of this has affected him and his family, and that he has decided to step down to keep his sanity. He is also going to be refunding all donations for iiSU, and is taking down his Ko-Fi link, so no further donations will go to him.

This is the final statement I'll be making after everything that transpired.
There's not much I can really say to fix or undo the damage done to iiSU and its integrity, and it seems like more false accusations and dated statements are beginning to pop up rapidly to defame my name even further.

I first began UsagiShade as a fun side-project. Nothing crazy, just sharing my love for games and all the niche community projects that surround them. I found out I was very good at presenting my thoughts visually, and that was enough to fuel my ambitions and garner the status I managed to build from scratch. However, not everyone wants to see things work out that way. People have done everything they could to drain that passion out of me, and at this point I only value the safety of my wife and the life I managed to build here away from the malice I left behind so long ago. It seems like no matter where you go, there will be people doing everything they can to drag you back with them.

This is no longer the community or the niche I came to know throughout my years of trying to be a part of something much larger than myself. I'm not going to continue apologizing for their sake, and I'm not gonna continue being a punching bag for a vocal minority that knows next to nothing about my life, creating any narrative they can to sour the notes even more than they already have been. This community, this project, this hobby, none of it has a place for me, and I sincerely don't belong here. I can handle the skeptics, the overly pessimistic crowd shutting down my ideas, that's expected. But my privacy, my character, and my dignity is something that I value much more than feeding people who feel entitled to my work and the effort I put behind it.

Whatever I said in the past has nothing to do with the way I carry myself today or the life I live now. This oversaturated swarm of stupidity and abuse is not what I would call home or the kind of environment I want to contribute to. I don't care what's said about me, what's assumed of me, or what anyone attempts to do down the line, nothing will ever drag me lower than it already has. I'm happy in my personal life and that's all I could ever ask for.

For better or for worse, I'm stepping down from iiSU as a whole. I've began refunding donations today, around $5k will be returned by the end of the night, starting with the most recent. Please do NOT donate to my Ko-Fi past this point, the link will be taken down shortly. If you still want to donate to iiSU as a project, I'm handing it all to my team. I trust @Nathan (ᴇʟᴅᴇʀ ᴍᴏɴᴋᴇʏ) and know he's more cut out for this role than I am. My team doesn't need me, I've already played my part.

Whether I return to YouTube or not is not up for debate. I've made up my mind and thought this entire thing through. I've always known I'm much happier offline, and this experience exemplifies that ten-fold. I simply don't have the energy to deal with any of this. I'm glad I was able to contribute to the community as much as I could, hopefully I left a positive mark in some way.

Thanks for everything. Whatever happens, I'm glad I was able to deliver what I could. Stay safe and take care ❤️

iShade - Announcement on iiSU Discord Server

Now, with the project in new hands, we will see where it goes from here. I am still very interested in seeing where the project goes, and I have hope that the team can turn this around. iiSU looks incredible, and it may be a tough road ahead, but it seems like it will be one worth traveling.

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